oh yes :D blogger is normal again.

gahhhhhhhhh. i hate being sick -.- i'm like sick every two, three weeks when i'm back here 0_o wth.

mms, i want puppies, kittens and duckies. aren't duckies adorable.

mms. up was like some good ol' southern comfort food. haha. if you get the analogy.

i'm a sucker for jon & kate + 8. gosh the kids are so adorable. haha, that's what i wish my kids would look like. there's this family that lives on the 16th floor, and oh my gosh, the two boys are beyond cute. the dad's american & white, the mum's american-japanese. and the kids are fluent in english, japanese and french. omg, just listening to their conversations in the lift is mind-blowing. they're like 8 and 6, and they will say something in english, have their mum reply in japanese, and then they reply in french. GAHHH. i swear my kids are definitely going to be trilingual. at the very least. definitely english, mandarin and japanese. how i envy and admire those natural linguists (because i'm not one, and i'm working my arse off studying japanese), and multi-linguists. sighs.

FINALLY! a dancer who is not only strong, but technically fantastic. she can do any kind of dance and her emoting skill are awesome. but the best best best thing i love, is that she's not your ideal dancer body-type, but she's gorgeous when she dances (:

i swear, i've got to be the only idiot that watches so you think you can dance and ends up this bawling mess. oh god. to get routines like that, to dance like that, to dance on a stage like that. fuck i would kill for it. and the funny thing really is that the ones that i really want, are always the lyrical, contemporary routines. i love the emoting quality of contemporary dance, the raw, stripped quality put out there. somehow i've grown rather distant from the 'performance' quality of ballroom, especially latin, with the full on sensuality. shrugs. perhaps i'm at a different stage now i suppose.

i realise that the past two years have been a solo journey. something which i didn't really think about much till recently. since secondary sch, its always been a group journey, be it with screw, or the trampers. and then with the dancers in rj. but now, its just me, plain and simple. perhaps its the lifestyle i've adopted, a temporary flitting lifestyle where i'm never in a single place for too long. so it becomes this one person story, with guest appearances i suppose.

but i must say.. i really quite like it. it makes life simple, drama-less, happy and moves in the exact way i want it too. but at the same time still, i miss those dance practices, the gym trainings, the kboxing, the nonsense shit in the classroom and special moments.

i mentioned to angie once, if i had to choose between traveling and marriage, which would i choose, i really wouldn't know. i honestly honestly wouldn't know. and i've yet to consider whether that actually scares me. hmms.

happy birthday jie. i love you.

[edit] mms. this feels like digging up very old things, haha. but i just have to say it. i never realised how lucky we were in rj, for the support we got for the dancers and dance club was always beyond amazing. when you look at western schools, its always the singers and cheerleaders and athletes that get all that support, and dancers kinda fade off somewhere. and yet in rj, the support always was awesome. the time it took to sell out amarante for example (: hahaha, the dancers were so gleeful that day. they were wonderful times. sighs. i esp miss you spinkie ):[/edit]

how i wish constantly that i am indeed the string that holds everything together.

all the lines are separating now. diverging. and really, the only thing that can bring those lines together is something that lies deep inside our hearts, something that draws you back to where it all began. i hope it stays there.

mms, i never want to stop being optimistic really. i want to believe in the best that can be, the best that ppl can be, and all the wonders of this world.

call it an idealistic youthful folly or whatever, i'm happy this way